When Panic Crashes the Party: A Love Note to the One Minute You’re Okay and the Next You’re Not
I was having a good day.
The kind where your coffee hits just right, your skin glows a little more than usual, and you feel like the world is finally giving you a standing ovation. I was checking things off my to-do list like a boss. I even looked in the mirror and thought, “Damn, girl. You’ve still got it.”
And then out of nowhere it hit me.
My heart raced. My hands started shaking. Tears welled up in my eyes without warning. My breath shortened. And the worst part? I didn’t even know why. I wasn’t in danger. Nothing had happened. But my body was screaming like it was under siege.
I was having a panic attack.
I couldn’t drive. I couldn’t speak without choking on my own tears. I called my husband my safe place and whispered through sobs, “I need you. Please come get me.” And he did, no questions asked. Because sometimes, you don’t need solutions you just need someone who loves you enough to show up when you’re unraveling.
So… what do you do when panic shows up uninvited?
Here’s what I’ve learned, both from personal experience and from gentle research I’ve clung to in my more grounded moments:
1. First: You Are Not Broken.
Panic attacks are like emotional earthquakes. They don’t mean you’re weak or unstable they just mean you’ve been holding it together for too long, or maybe your body just short-circuited. Don’t shame yourself for feeling. You’re human. You are still strong. And no, this does not erase all the joy or progress you had earlier. Both can exist.
2. Breathe—Literally.
The fastest way to help your nervous system calm down is to slow your breath. Try this:
Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds
Hold for 4 seconds
Exhale through your mouth for 6 seconds
Repeat for a few minutes.
This resets the fight-or-flight response and helps bring you back.
3. Call Someone.
It doesn’t have to be your husband. It can be a friend, a sister, a neighbor. Someone who won’t judge. Someone who’ll say, “I’ve got you.” If you don’t feel safe being alone, call for help. No guilt, no shame.
4. Ground Yourself.
Use your senses:
Name 5 things you see
4 things you can touch
3 things you hear
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste
It’s called the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique and it’s a lifesaver.
5. You Don’t Have to Know the Why Right Now.
Sometimes it’s past trauma. Sometimes it’s hormones. Sometimes it’s too many tabs open in your brain. And sometimes, it’s just Tuesday. Don’t obsess over the cause in the moment—focus on safety and calming down.
Let’s Get Real for a Minute:
Mental health struggles don’t care how accomplished, happy, loved, or spiritually aligned you are. They come for all of us. And panic attacks don’t knock they kick the door in.
But here’s the truth: You are not crazy. You are not alone. And you are not less worthy because of this moment.
So if it happens to you and I hope it doesn’t, but if it does don’t be afraid to say, “I need help.” You deserve that help. You are not a burden. You are a breathing, feeling, doing-your-best human being.
And that’s more than enough.
To the one who had a great day… until they didn’t:
You are still worthy.
You are still strong.
You are still beautiful.
And this too, will pass.
Now breathe. Cry if you need to. Call your person. And remember:
Panic may have crashed the party, but you still own the house.